Going Through Hell
by RemmyBlack
Summary: Jack Frost reminds Bunny of someone he lost and his logic and reasoning is affected. He knows Frost hasn't done anything but it hurts him.


**A/N: So...this idea suddenly came to me when I re-re-re-watched Rise of the Guardians and couldn't shake the longing look Bunny had when he was with Sophie. I wrote two versions of this, this version and the one in the way I originally planned it to go. I like this version better so I published it. **

**Disclaimer: Rise of the Guardians doesn't belong to me. Neither does the title. I took it from a song called 'If your Going through Hell" and can't remember the artist. **

* * *

**Going Through Hell**

The snow hurts, the ice hurts, the cold wind hurts. The blanket of white ground hurts. Frost hurts. Jack Frost hurts. It's not their fault, Jack Frost was doing his job. But it still hurts. So much. To know he failed, to constantly be reminded he failed.

He didn't deserve to be Hope. Didn't deserve a new beginning. How could he when he failed his son? His sweet son who already had a tough beginning in life. His Snowdrop wasn't biologically his, he had found the snow Pooka curled up in a tree, frightened. Snowdrop's birth parents had abandoned him. Bunny wasn't consorted, the only desire he had was to have a kit but he wasn't going to consort someone just for a kit. It wouldn't have been fair to the partner or the resulting kit.

_A small white kit shivered, hindquarters pressed against bark inside the hollow of the tree. Eyes staring at an older buck._

Bunny had taken in the kit, he had pushed back the thought that he could adopt him, concentrating on the well-being of the child. Days had turned into weeks, weeks to months. The kit was named Snowdrop, one for his love of snow and habit of just dropping whenever and wherever there was some on the ground.

_Bunny stood right next to Snowdrop as the kit rolled around happily in the snow. Bunny was shivering but the soft tooth-chattering kit was worth the cold. Experimenting, Snowdrop took a pawful of snow and gently threw it at the unsuspecting Pooka. Giggling, he rolled around more before nudging his nose to Bunny's leg._

The other because the flower 'Snowdrop' meant hope, something he had been slowly losing.

_Snowdrop stood a fair distance away from Bunny, before hopping once and looking back at Bunny. Inviting the blue-grey-coloured Pooka to chase him. Bunny took the invitation. A blur of white and grey-blue as Bunny slowed his pace to always be just out-of-reach of the kit. _

His son loved practical jokes, once he knew Bunny would never abandon or hurt him, he often made Bunny a target. For the more-serious ones, Snowdrop was punished but Bunny let the others go, they were only small and harmless after all. Nothing wrong with a little fun, he had said.

_Bunny shaking off flour, Snowdrop laughing at his Kiagrf, a shortened slang form of 'father', similar to 'daddy'. Snowdrop missed the smirk Bunny was unable to contain, a squeak fell from the kit as he was tackled by Bunny. Flour covering the whole of the kit as they rolled. _

It was nearing Snowdrop's birthday when the Pooka Purge happened. He had hidden his son in a place designed exactly for cases where he would need to protect Snowdrop but could not be there.

The room failed. The shadow horses were ruthless against his son and he was too late to save his child. As he hibernated through the most heaviest part of his grief, he was struck with disturbing thoughts and plans.

_"Hope's you, Kiagrf," Two small white paws on his leg, Snowdrop's face full of the sincerity only a kit-or child- could have. His Snowdrop had truly believed it. _

Snowdrop had said that in response to explaining what 'hope' meant to his kit. The true belief of a child, his own kit, was the only reason he kept hold of the thinning thread of hope. Snowdrop, in a way, had saved Bunny.

"Kangaroo!" Cold air that always happened when Jack was around greeted the Pooka and bringing him out of his memories, "Bunny?"

"What is-" Why was his voice so croaky?

"Why are you crying?"

Bunny stared wide-eyed at the larrikin, noticing his eyes were itchy and fur wet. "I-What are you doing here, larrikin?"

Jack perched on his staff, staring at the Pooka in confusion, "What's a lar-no! You are avoiding the question, Kangaroo! Don't make me cover the Warren in snow."

_Snowdrop shaking his snow-covered fur inside the burrow, causing a small paddle in the doorway._

_Snowdrop moving snow inside in attempt to have it in his nest._

_Snowdrop dragging his Kiagrf outside to the snow._

Bunny smiled at Jack, causing him to nearly fall of his staff.

"What's wrong, Bunny?!" Jack hopped off his staff, "Do I need to call North? Sandy? Tooth?"

"Nothing's wrong, Jackie."

"You..you just called me Jackie, okay, there's _definitely_ something wr-woah!" Jack startled as Bunny grabbed the sprite and ran towards a bed of white drooping flowers. Beside it was a wood-carved framing a bed of the same flowers. Or at least what Jack thought were the same flowers, they looked the same.

"Jack, cover this bed, just this one, with a fine layer of snow." Bunny instructed, gesturing to the non-framed flowers,

Jack slowly backed away, "You feeling okay, Bunny?"

"I designed these flowers to handle a little snow, I need to know if it works."

"Why?"

Bunny contemplated, "I...I made the flowers as a gift for a child I know-knew. He loved the snow, would always roll in it and went out of his way to walk in a fresh patch of snow. His grave is the second flower-bed, the one framed. The flowers in both beds are identical."

Jack knelt and slowly dusted the first bed of flowers with his snow. After he finished, no dirt could be seen. He didn't say anything about the fresh tear-tracks Bunny had when the Pooka came to inspect the snow-covered bed. Nor did he say anything as Bunny nudged the framed bed and whispered something. He did attempt to say something as the Pooka sat back and looked at him with a weird expression.

"Do...do you mind if you repeat the exact same process on the framed flower-bed, please?"

Jack moved to the frame, concentrating not to mess it up and he dusted the dirt with a layer of snow. Stepping back, he watched as Bunny muttered something before a new white-droopy flower sprouted, right in the middle of the bed.

"Thanks, Jack."

Okay, now this was getting really strange.

"Bunny?"

"I'm sorry," Bunny mumbled, "For how I treated you these last 300 years."

"Uh, you're forgiven?" That's what people say when they've been apologised for, right?

Jack watched as the Pooka sat on his hind legs, Bunny seemed to be contemplating on what to say.

"That flowerbed is the grave of my kit,"

"I'm sorry," Jack murmured as he perched on the ground near Bunny, squashing down the surprise of _Bunny_ being a parent.

"He would have really liked you. Couldn't get enough of the snow and he was a right larrikin, too."

"Larrikin?"

Bunny smiled briefly before lowering his head, "He was only five when Pitch attacked. I hid him in a room that was supposed to protect him, the Nightmares got to him and...slaughtered him."

Jack didn't know what to say or do to comfort Bunny. In the end, he scooted a little closer to the Guardian.

Bunny took a shuddering breath, "H-he...his name was Snowdrop, that's what those flowers are. It is-was- Pooka tradition to name kits after flowers. I named him Snowdrop partially cause he would always drop the second he stepped on snow and proceeded to roll. Th-the other reason b-because in f-flower language it means 'hope'. I h-had be-en los-losing hope before the little larrikin came into my l-life.

I-If it w-wasn't f-for Sno-Snowdrop, Easter-_I _wouldn't exist."

Jack cocked his head in confusion, "That's your centre, isn't it? Hope?"

Bunny nodded shakily, "S-Snowdrop once asked me what h-hope was o-once. He, he said that was me and...and h-how I gave him h-hope."

"Kangaroo?"

"The...the egg hunts was inspired by Snowdrop, he loved getting me to hide things in the snow and look for them." Bunny looked guiltily at Jack, "It doesn't excuse my actions but the snow in '68 reminded me of those times and...a-and I become a right bastard after being reminded so suddenly."

"I already forgave you, remember kangaroo?" Jack looked over Bunny, the Pooka's eyes were red and bright, revealing he's been crying, wet patches in his fur covered his cheeks and the slight tremble revealed to outsiders the conversation was not a happy-one. "Is that why you get so riled up when North says Christmas is more important?"

"Y-yeah, it-it's stupid because North doesn't know, none of the other Guardians know about Snowdrop. B-but every time he says it, it's like he's saying my son isn't important. I...wouldn't be able to go through this ho-liday if it wasn't for Snowdrop."

Jack scratched the back of his neck as Bunny fell silent, he didn't know what to say.

"Uh Kangaroo?"

"I'm not a Kangaroo,"

Jack was thankful for some sense of normalcy, "Don't tell North this but I prefer Easter more than Christmas."

Bunny's face changed into one of confusion before turning to the winter sprite, searching his face for any dishonesty or disillusioned. He wouldn't find any, Jack really did prefer the Kangaroo's holiday to North.

"I was a Puritan when I was alive, Christmas had always seem more about materialism where Easter seemed more centred around family." Jack twisted his staff nervously,

"I thought you couldn't remember before you were Jack Frost?"

"I couldn't, Tooth allowed me to look at my memories. Even so, some of my upbringing remained with me when I became Jack Frost." Jack shrugged, a light blue coloured his face, "As such, I always preferred Easter over Christmas. Don't mention that to North."

"No dramas, mate. North will never know."

"Bunny?"

"Yeah, mate?"

"What's a larrikin?"

"Oh, rack off, you gumby."

"What's 'rack off' and 'gumby' mean?"

"Gumby's an idiot, and stop asking me these questions!"

"Well stop using confusing words and you won't have these questions, _mate_." Jack blinked, "That does not sound right."

"Bloody show pony."

* * *

**A/N ...The ending ran away from me. I like writing Australian slang even though I have to dig around. And I don't know whose fanfic I read but now my headcanon has Jack as a Puritan when he was human. This is just a one-shot. Snowdrop does, in flower language, mean hope as well as pure. Also, there's a superstition that if you see one lone snowdrop, disaster or death is coming your room. Which is really confusing considering it's flower meaning. **

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed. :) **


End file.
